Valentine's Day on a Budget? No Problem!

Hey, lovers! Economic times are tough, but you still want to express your devotion to your sweetie, right? Here are some ideas for a romantically frugal Valentine's Day!

1. Don't buy flowers: instead, make your own out of paper, fabric, or an old shoe you're not using anymore.
2. Don't go to a bed & breakfast: instead, take a walk in the park together! If you don't live near a park, look at a picture of a park in a magazine. If you don't live near a magazine, tell each other stories about parks you have been to. If you've never been to a park, say the word "park" to each other over and over.
3. Instead of expensive jewelry, your special lady might enjoy a "gift certificate" for something that you promise to do for her in the future, like wash her car, give her a massage, or stop covertly draining her bank account to finance your secret family in St. Louis.
4. Instead of going out dancing, stay in and sleep! Just sleep. All day and night. Because guess what, sleepin's free!
5. Instead of a pricey bottle of champagne, put water in a champagne glass and just tell them it's champagne! They won't know!
6. Don't go out to dinner. Ever again.
7. Donate blood together, and don't tell your special guy or gal you stole the idea from Dylan and Brenda on 90210.
8. Buy recycled candy instead of new!
9. Find out what your significant other values more than anything else in the world and then use that to mock and insult him/her until he/she breaks up with you the day before Valentine's Day. Then you're in the clear, Romeo! Apologize on February 15th and no harm done, you've just saved a pretty penny.
10. Go to a zoo and watch animals do it.

[Posted today on HuffPost and AirAmerica.]